Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Here's A Little Story I Gots To Tell

Inspiration - "Paul Revere" - Beastie Boys "Here's a little story I gots to tell/about three bad brothers you know so well/It started way back in history/with Adrock, MCA and me, Mike D."

What I'm Listening To - "Jagged Edge" - Jagged Edge. LOL I'm glad they came up with such an original title for their album.

Question(s) I Asked Myself Today: "Am I the only one digging that new Nelly Furtado song with Timbaland?" and "What race is Nelly Furtado anyway?"

As I promised in my 100th post, I'm gonna try to stop censoring myself on my blog. In the spirit of full disclosure I need to tell y'all something about me. For the last 4 months, I have been the other man. This is what happened.

Back in January, my ex infiltrated the bloggy. I at first wanted nothing to do with her b/c she broke my heart once before. But we sparked up a friendship, through IM and phone calls and I found myself getting caught up again. She came to visit in February and by the time she left, I thought I was over her again. I mean, it was really cool seeing her, but she was married. T. can't get caught up with no married woman, can he?

Apparently the answer is yes. Despite my best intentions, I was drawn more and more to her. Hell, I still loved her five years after the fact. We began talking more and more, and I put all my other prospects to the side. As for her, she was in tough situation. Trapped in a loveless marraige, but trying to make it work for the sake of her child. I did everything I could do to be supportive, even postponing my happiness so she could handle her business. But as I fell deeper and deeper in love, my selfish side started coming out. I felt that I deserved more than late night phone calls and instant messages when her husband was sleep. We kind of put the brakes on things until she could sort out her situation

That lasted all of about 24 hours. Then we were right back where we started from. The subject of divorce came up and although, I wasnt pushing for it at first, I certainly was open to the prospect. We talked about her moving back to Atlanta, she even applied for jobs here. Soon reality reared its ugly head and she realized that it would be difficult for her to move across country taking her son away from his father. Just like that, the love I thought I was going to have, was put on hold indefinitely again.

Eventually, she moved out of the house and we talked about having a future again. I mean we got way ahead of ourselves. Talking about marraige and children and where we would live. I started looking for gigs out on the west coast, so we could be together, and her son could still be near his father. I was going to fly out there for a weekend, cuz I just had to see her. A couple of days before I was supposed to leave, she decided that we were not being fair to her family. I say she decided because even though I knew it wasn't right, I didn't really acknowledge that fact. She moved back home to give it a try, but again that lasted about 24 hours. Next thing I knew she was on a flight to ATL and we were having a fun filled sex filled weekend. I mean we did it every where and in every way, all the while expressing our love for each other. That weekend was supposed to tide me over until the next time, but it did nothing but make me want to be with her even more.

Over the next couple of weeks, we had marathon phone sessions. She was the first voice I heard in the morning, and the last voice I heard at night. The end all be all, if you will. The only problem was that she was still in the house with her husband. I played it as cool as I possibly could, but in the back of my mind that living arrangement was fucking with me. I noticed that our conversations were punctuated with more silence than usual. Then she told me something that pretty much ended it for me. She said that she had sex with her husband. I should not have even been mad, thats what she is supposed to do, but to me that felt like a betrayal. It was the tipping point for what I knew was a messed up situation. I acted like I was the wronged party but in all honesty i knew that I was the transgressor. I was determined not to wait around for her. Its time to live my life and find that one woman that I would not have to share. It even would have been different for me if she was at least out of the house, but financial concerns prevented that.

Fast forward to last week. We had resumed contact and fell into that old familiar trap. It was like my epiphany from the previous week didn't happen. My addiction led me back to an unhealthy situation. What about her family? They don't deserve me being a home wrecker. What about me? I don't deserve being the other man. I deserve someone who can be all mine. What about the divorce? Well, it hasnt happened yet. I truly believe her feelings are genuine, but I can't just sit idle, while she handles her business. I broke it off with her, at least until such time as she actually gets divorced. So as of this writing, I am no longer the other man. I am a free agent, ready to sign with whatever team makes the best offer. Finally, I am emotionally free. Lets just hope it lasts longer than 24 hours this time. Hows that for honesty?

It was written...

49 Comments:

Blogger nikki said...

that's "crabs in my crotch" honesty for ya. great post!

and you're human. shit, it might not last 24 hours and if it don't, so be it. if it does, good for you!

one thing i've heard is that 'other folk' sex is like the best sex ever cuz there's a sense of urgency to it, like it's that 'forbidden' thing. i wonder how true that is.

you get props for putting this out there. i hope the sista involved is cool with it, though. then again, the whole episode is part of the growth process, huh?

Wed May 31, 12:02:00 PM  
Blogger Mocha said...

Before I read the whole thing, i'll tell ya Nelly is Portugese-Canadaian..now Imma read what you had to say ;)

Wed May 31, 01:29:00 PM  
Blogger Mo said...

What an amazing 100th post, T. Often times, it's hard to admit to ourselves that we're in a situation that just plain wrong. I commend your courage, and altough you were the "other man," I feel for you, I really do. It's hard when your heart and your head can't come to a compromise about these things...
It will get better as time goes by. Hopefully the next 24 hours won't prove too disappointing.

Scarlett

Wed May 31, 01:31:00 PM  
Blogger Mocha said...

whew.

it's tough when what you know you deserve conflicts with what your heart tells you, you want.

It sounds like you made the healthy, logical decision, but as we all know healthy doesn't always feel good and logic doesn't always last.

I agree with Nikki, if it's really what you want I hope it lasts more than 24 hours, but if it doesn't dont' be too tough on yourself.

That's sum kinda honesty. I'm hoping that whatever happens, it ends with you being happy.

Wed May 31, 01:38:00 PM  
Blogger Miz JJ said...

Wow. That was an intense post. It really brought me back to a place and time in my life. I can only say that nothing good can come of being with someone who cheats on their spouse even if the marriage is 'loveless'. In my opinion you deserve better than her and that situation.

Wed May 31, 01:39:00 PM  
Blogger DramaFree said...

I ditto what MizJJ said. You do deserve better. But don't beat yourself up if the feelings just don't go away overnight. It happens to the best of us.

Wed May 31, 01:49:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dayum.

Wed May 31, 02:36:00 PM  
Blogger So...Wise...Sista said...

How does it feel to let it out? Good, right?

Excellent post, T.

Of course you deserve better, you know that. Problem is, what you have is not better. And what you want isnt yours to have. Sucks. I will refrain from providing any "advice" bec you already read word for word how wise I am. lol But I will say, stay up. You made the right decision, even if you only manage it in spurts.

Why did you guys break up in the first place?

Wed May 31, 02:39:00 PM  
Blogger i like liquor and tv said...

Get you a girlfriend. I bet she'll speed that divorce up.

Stop answering her calls for about 2 weeks straight. I bet she'll speed that divorce up.

Block her IM's for about a week. I bet she'll speed that divorce up.

My point is...why should she leave her husband when she's having the best of both worlds?

Wed May 31, 02:54:00 PM  
Blogger The Stiltwalker said...

how you gone be the other man in another state? what kind of shit is that? you could actually be man #6 for all you know.

I just hope you're truly over it cause that's a jacked up situation to be in. And dangerous.

Wed May 31, 03:05:00 PM  
Blogger So...Wise...Sista said...

Liquor & TV makes a damn good point. lol

Wed May 31, 05:56:00 PM  
Blogger Nika Laqui said...

Liquor &TV is right...
So yes if you don't want to be the other man, then you have to nip it in the budd...

I'm glad you posted this...there are always pros and cons of being the "other".

So yall did it everywhere huh? Did yall do it in the garage with her BD in the house?....*lol*

Wed May 31, 06:37:00 PM  
Blogger Nika Laqui said...

Nikki it is true...
Forbidden sex it the best...you cum from thinking about it while you're cumming from the action...*lol*

I know all about forbidden sex...*lol*

Wed May 31, 06:39:00 PM  
Blogger nikki said...

liquor is on point, no doubt. that shit's true for guys, too. lol

Wed May 31, 06:50:00 PM  
Blogger Tenacious said...

**yanks off wig**

That's what I'm talking 'bout! I <3 the honesty!

I'm conflicted with the situation due to my own personal opinion but I would just advise you to guard your heart. Situations like this never end in the way that you want although Liquor & TV brings up a very good point as well the stiltwalker. It could become very dangerous for you. Just be safe and like I said, guard your heart.

Wed May 31, 07:35:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whoa...you's a ho!!!

Just kidding homie, you know I luv ya. But don't worry, the right woman will come along and hopefully she won't have that "jaded" look.

Wed May 31, 09:14:00 PM  
Blogger Angel said...

the only way that something is gonna change is when you get fed up with not having. not having enough time. not having enough attention. not having enough sex. not having enough control. being the "other" is a difficult ass place to be. believe me, im currently trying to "release" myself from some similar demons...
~fallen angel

Wed May 31, 10:10:00 PM  
Blogger Superstar Nic said...

Damn, T. Cas…what a situation. I don’t even know what to say, but I feel for you on that one. That's just so sad. I agree with Mocha, whatever happens, I hope that it ends with YOU being happy ;-)

That’s honesty for you – most definitely!

Thu Jun 01, 12:16:00 AM  
Blogger ChezNiki said...

The married people who cheat usually dont leave their spouses...its cheaper to keep...him. Especially when there are kids involved. The child custody issue alone may keep her with her husband until the children are of age...even if she is unhappily married.

Protect yourself, buy some shorts and sunblock and find yourself a free (available) woman on the EAST coast to ride your rollercoaters with.

We Bloggers just dont want you to get hurt, Boo!

Thu Jun 01, 12:37:00 AM  
Blogger Mahogany Misfit said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Thu Jun 01, 04:02:00 AM  
Blogger Mahogany Misfit said...

Ok, did I mention that I love this blog of yours? Well I do!

You have no idea how much I relate to this post...I'm in a similar situaion with one of the guys I'm seeing back on the east coast. I moved to Phoenix and he got desperate and let his wife move back in! We're still continuing our madness and I saw him when I went back home a few weeks ago. This type of thing is like an addiction and it's HARD to break! If you truly want to stay out of this relationship, I really hope you succeed! No judgement though,not from me!

I just wanted to convey to you that I read this post and felt completely in sync wth you and your feelings!

Thu Jun 01, 04:03:00 AM  
Blogger Rashan Jamal said...

Thanks everybody for the non judgemental discussion. I appreciate everybody's feedback.

Thu Jun 01, 05:30:00 AM  
Blogger Lyrically speaking said...

This was a very interesting post...wow

Thu Jun 01, 08:30:00 AM  
Blogger NegroPino™ said...

i LIKE THAT SONG BY NELLY FURTADO TOO ITS ON MY MP3 PLAYER

Thu Jun 01, 02:40:00 PM  
Blogger Sangindiva said...

Damn T -
I think we all have been the other at some point...
I mean I know I have!
But all it does as you can see
is break your heart in the end.

Thu Jun 08, 06:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very nice site! Women ovulation induction clomid Barcode reader with keyboard newyork mega millions Nexium people pepcid pneumonia prilosec susceptible online pharmacy seroquel Land loan calculator texas Best price ultram Mitac gps car kit Ac adaptor and battery charger Air preheater sensor 1999 toyota landcruiser seroquel for migraines games video games word games scrabble scrabble complete cedar lake indiana boating http://www.personal-stationery.info/Seroquel.html seroquel mechanism of action seroquel diabetes antipsychotic drug seroquel

Sat Feb 17, 01:14:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

buy bactrim without a prescription overnight buy bactrim online buy bactrim f buy bactrim without prescription buy bactrim es online without prescription buy bactrim
[url=http://bactrim.eventbrite.com/]buy bactrim [/url]
side effects of glucophage glucophage in poly cystic ovarian syndrome glucophage for pcos taking medroxyprogesterone then glucophage glucophage and estrogen taking glucophage with birth control pills glucophage side effect
[url=http://takeglucophage.eventbrite.com/]glucophage xl [/url]
libido proscar proscar false readings proscar finasteride proscar price painful erection proscar generic 5mg proscar cheap proscar and propecia
[url=http://proscar.eventbrite.com/]teva proscar [/url]
impotence aids order levitra impotence order levitra levitra commercial cheap levitra free levitra
[url=http://virb.com/yalevi]temporary impotence [/url]
http://proscar.eventbrite.com/

Tue Feb 16, 02:58:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello,

I mostly visits this website[url=http://www.weightrapidloss.com/lose-10-pounds-in-2-weeks-quick-weight-loss-tips].[/url]Plenty of useful information on visionz74.blogspot.com. Do you pay attention towards your health?. Let me show you one truth. Research points that nearly 60% of all U.S. adults are either chubby or overweight[url=http://www.weightrapidloss.com/lose-10-pounds-in-2-weeks-quick-weight-loss-tips].[/url] Hence if you're one of these citizens, you're not alone. Infact many among us need to lose 10 to 20 lbs once in a while to get sexy and perfect six pack abs. Now the question is how you are planning to have quick weight loss? Quick weight loss can be achived with little effort. If you improve some of your daily diet habbits then, its like piece of cake to quickly lose weight.

About me: I am writer of [url=http://www.weightrapidloss.com/lose-10-pounds-in-2-weeks-quick-weight-loss-tips]Quick weight loss tips[/url]. I am also health trainer who can help you lose weight quickly. If you do not want to go under painful training program than you may also try [url=http://www.weightrapidloss.com/acai-berry-for-quick-weight-loss]Acai Berry[/url] or [url=http://www.weightrapidloss.com/colon-cleanse-for-weight-loss]Colon Cleansing[/url] for fast weight loss.

Sun Mar 21, 02:56:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks a lot for your advice guys, it helped me a lot, I went to www.saveabreakup.com and followed their step by step instructions and it worked perfectly, now me and my girlfriend are back together.

Tue Oct 05, 02:06:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

clomid days 2-6 | buy unprescribed clomid online - clomid without prescriptions, clomid complications

Wed Nov 14, 12:47:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

how long after taking clomid do you ovulate | http://buyclomidonline.jimdo.com/#24997 - taking 100mg clomid, clomid success rate

Wed Nov 14, 06:09:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

clomid ovulation calculator | [url=http://buy-clomid-online.webs.com/#60232]clomid buy uk[/url] - clomid prescription, ufgd taking clomid to get pregnant

Thu Nov 15, 07:13:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I lovеd as much aѕ you will receiѵe cаrried out гight here.
Τhe skеtch is attractiѵe,
your authοred mаteriаl styliѕh.
nonetheless, you command get got an ѕhаkiness οvеr that you wіsh be deliverіng the
follοwing. unwell unquestionably come more fοrmerly agaіn sіnce eхactly the
ѕame neаrly νeгy often insiԁe caѕe you shіelԁ thiѕ hike.


my blog ... payday advance
Feel free to surf my webpage - payday advance

Mon Feb 11, 07:02:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Нi Dear, are yοu in fact vіѕiting
this web page rеgulаrly, if
so aftеrward уou will ωithout dοubt get niсe experience.


Also visit mу blog post payday loans no credit check

Fri Mar 15, 07:40:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I waѕ suggested thіѕ websitе
by mу couѕin. I am not surе ωhetheг thіs ρoѕt
is written bу him аs nο one else κnow such
detailed about mу trouble. You're wonderful! Thanks!

My page :: instant payday loans
Also see my web site - instant payday loans

Sun Mar 17, 09:37:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great blog here! Also your web site lоaԁѕ up very faѕt!
What ωeb host are you usіng? Ϲan I
gеt your аffiliate link to уοur host?
I wish my sitе loaԁed up as fаst as yours lοl

My web-site - short term loans

Thu Apr 11, 05:18:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sіmрly want to say уour artiсlе is aѕ amazing.
The clearnesѕ in your ρost is јuѕt great and i сould assume уou аre
an еxpeгt on this subject. Well with your pеrmisѕion let me tο gгab youг RЅS
feеԁ to kеep up to dаte with fοrthcoming рost.
Thanks a mіllion and plеasе carrу on the еnjοyable work.


my wеblog payday loans

Thu Apr 11, 02:27:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Undenіablу іmаgine thаt that you
saіd. Yοur fаvorіte juѕtificatiоn seеmеԁ to
bе at thе іnternet the simplеst thing to remember of.
Ӏ ѕаy to yοu, I certаinlу
get іrkeԁ whilst othеr fоlks cοnsіder concerns that they
plаіnly don't understand about. You managed to hit the nail upon the highest as neatly as outlined out the entire thing without having side effect , folks can take a signal. Will probably be again to get more. Thank you

Here is my web page :: payday loans

Thu Apr 18, 02:32:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ӏ do not eѵen knoω how I еnded up here,
but I thоught this poѕt ωas good.
I do not know who you are but certainly you are gοing to a fаmous blоgger
if yοu аren't already ;) Cheers!

my homepage ... Payday Loans

Tue May 07, 01:12:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've been browsing online greater than three hours nowadays, yet I by no means discovered any interesting article like yours. It is lovely value sufficient for me. In my opinion, if all website owners and bloggers made excellent content as you probably did, the web might be a lot more helpful than ever before.

Here is my homepage :: Same Day Payday Loans

Sun May 12, 05:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ι've been exploring for a little bit for any high quality articles or blog posts in this sort of area . Exploring in Yahoo I ultimately stumbled upon this web site. Reading this information So i'm happy
to ехhіbit that I havе аn incredіblу just rіght unсanny feelіng Ӏ сame upon ϳust what I nееded.
Ι so much indisputably will mаke suге to do not put out of уour
mind this ωeb ѕіte аnd give іt a look on a соntinuіng bаsis.


Alѕo vіsіt my blog post: New Bingo Sites

Thu May 16, 08:36:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi to every single one, it's in fact a good for me to go to see this web page, it includes priceless Information.

Visit my blog post :: New Bingo Sites

Sat May 18, 08:16:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep this gοing pleasе, great jοb!

Also visit my website - payday loans

Mon May 20, 05:08:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This piece of writing рrоvides clear idea in supρогt of the new viewers of blοgging, thаt really how to do blogging аnd site-building.


Lοok into my blοg :: payday loans

Mon May 20, 05:08:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank yοu fοr the auspіcious ωrіteup.
It іn faсt was a аmusement account it.

Lοоk advаnced tο faг аdԁed agreeable from you!
Βy the ωay, hoω сan ωe сommunicate?


Alѕo viѕit my homepage :: buy hcg drops

Mon May 20, 04:58:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Нi there, іts gοod агtіcle аbout mеdіа print, we аll underѕtаnԁ media
is a imρressive sοurсе οf informatiοn.


Mу wеblоg :: payday loans

Sun May 26, 05:33:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whoa! Thiѕ blog looks ϳust like my οld one!
It's on a completely different subject but it has pretty much the same layout and design. Great choice of colors!

Also visit my page - hgh supplements review

Thu Jun 06, 02:24:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I seldοm create remarκs, however after геading a few of
the respοnses on this page "Here's A Little Story I Gots To Tell".
I actuаlly do have a cоuρle of queѕtiοns fоr
уou іf it's allright. Is it just me or does it look as if like a few of these responses come across as if they are coming from brain dead people? :-P And, if you are writing on additional sites, I'd
like to keep up with еverythіng neω уou have tο ρost.
Coulԁ you list of all of all your shared pagеs liκе your Fаceboοk ρage,
tωitter fееd, or linkedin profile?

Feel free tο surf to my ρаge; grey hair

Fri Jun 07, 11:07:00 PM  
Blogger yanmaneee said...

yeezy 500
vapormax
off white
off white clothing
kyrie shoes
supreme new york
zx flux
westbrook shoes
air max 2019
nfl jerseys

Fri Jul 19, 07:11:00 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home