Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Girls Girls Girls Girls

Inspiration "Girls Girls Girls" - Jay-Z Girls, girls, girls, girls (uh-huh)Girls, I do adore/Yo put your number on this paper/ cause I would love to date ya/Holla at ya when I come off tour

What I'm Listening To - An Isley's Brothers Mix

Question(s) I Asked Myself Today - "Am I obsessed with Jay-Z lyrics?" I noticed that I have 3 blog titles from Jigga's lyrics in the last week. Well 4 if you count tomorrow's post.

Have you ever heard of Murphy's Law? Basically, its a theory that says whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. Well I bet you never heard of T.Casanova's Law. This theory states that if you have one girl that digs you, two or three more will soon come to your attention. It's like when you have no prospects, you can't find any one you are interested in. But as soon as you meet one woman, guaranteed you are going to meet some more interesting, beautiful, intelligent women. The last few weeks have seen me falling victim to T.Casanova's Law. I went a long time without finding a woman that really piqued my interests and now in a short period of time, I have too many to choose from. Here's the deal:

Let me set the record straight: the S stories I wrote were actually true stories. I put them in a form of fiction to test out my narrative skills. See, in my heart I'm a writer. I love telling stories in a way that I haven't seen before. So, I intended the S series to be a weekly feature in which I flexed my writing muscles. I would just write about what happened, but in prose form. I still have one more S entry that I have written but have yet to post, but I think I'll stop after that because I don't wanna end up like R.Kelly singing about being trapped in a closet for 2 years. The point is this: S and I hung out and we are digging each other, but of course T.Casanova's Law is in effect.

If you read this entry then you know around the same time, an ex found my spot. This is a woman that I was in love with for a long time. Long story short, reading my blog turned into instant messaging. Instant Messaging turned into phone calls. Phone calls turned into cross country visits. Yeah, that's right. My ex is flying in tomorrow and as much as we have talked over the past few days, I really don't know what to think about that. On the one hand it will be good to see her, but it may not be the right thing to get caught up in her again. I can't help but think that this is just a sign of T.Casanova's Law. Would she even be around if I didn't already just meet someone?

Girl #3 knows nothing about the blog. I met her while hanging out a couple of weeks ago. But you know how you just meet someone that is mad cool and gets all your jokes. I'm not an easy person to talk to, but she hung right in there deflecting my sarcasm and throwing it right back at me. Man, I love a woman who challenges me mentally. I haven't even seen her again, but we have had some stimulating phone conversations. I have had a busy couple of weeks and at this point I don't think I can add girl #3 to my schedule. But again, T.Casanova's Law is proven right. If I had met her 6 months ago, everything would have been all good, but of course our paths could only cross during rush hour traffic.

Girl # 4 is not a girl at all. She is a grown woman with a beautiful mind. Our conversations range from the philosophical to the emotional to the innane. I still marvel at how we can go from discussing something as serious as racial identity to something as ridiculous as Brokeback Jedi: the story of what would Star Wars be like if the main characters were gay. I can honestly say that I have never had better conversations with anyone in my life. We advise each other on our writing and bounce ideas of one another. We give each other the advice we need to hear, not what we want to hear. There's only one problem, she's already in a relationship. I know we can't be together, but that doesn't stop me from having inappropriate notions or being addicted to her mind like some black tar heroin. T.Casanova's law strikes again.

See the biggest problem is that despite my pen name, I'm not a playa. I never have been. I'm the guy that's always either in a relationship or on my way to one. And this is not about sex. I'm not trying to be a manwhore around town. I don't think I've actually dated more than one person at a time this millenium. So, how do I balance my monogamous nature with the possibility of a connection with different women. Hell if I know. If I knew that I wouldn't have had to write this. If anyone has any ideas, feel free to shoot them my way. And to my real life friends who are reading this, please hold off on any set ups, blind dates or "you will like hers." I appreciate you looking out for me, but as you can see I got my hands (and brain) full right now. I do reserve the right to change my mind at any time if she got a big booty. LOL. I'm out to get 4 hours of sleep before work tomorrow.

It was written...


Blogger Unsaid said...

Let me try to be as unbiased as possible and answer this question lol. Sounds like you view your monogamous (ha, that sounds like one game..you only have one game...anyway) nature in a positive light, as you should (you know how guys can be). So how do you balance that? I say don't expect too much early on, don't force anything. Give yourself the opportunity to know and then trust your instincts when they speak to you. I definitely can't say which girl is the one for you, if you don't know...then you don't know and that not knowing is where you find the balance. There is nothing wrong with connecting with different women, don't let your mind make a decision before your heart is ready. Or maybe your heart is ready but your mind can't decide....either way, don't decide...just know.

Keep doing what you're doing, being honest with yourself, and listening when "yourself" is being honest with you. You are in the perfect place right now, as far as I can see, dating wise. It's okay to date around.

Tue Feb 14, 07:11:00 AM  
Blogger nikki said...

i'm sure you've got the strength of mind to do what's right for everyone involved. there's definitely nothing wrong with dating around. that's how you find the woman who has if not all then most of the qualities you seek in a mate. it's a blessing to have choices, especially quality choices.

Tue Feb 14, 09:48:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

THe shoe fits DAMMIT!!!! :) (bb)

Tue Feb 14, 09:57:00 AM  
Blogger T. Cas said...

@ unsaid - I'm sure you know already, but I got your book Saturday. Haven't had time to read it yet, though. dating around may be cool but I really haven't done that in many years. Besides that's shit can get expensive. LOL

@ nikki - choice is good, but it would be nice if they didn't all come at same time. However, it can never be a bad thing to meet someone who gets you, nah mean?

@ bb- Shoe fits? are u talking 'bout "a lime to a lemon, my VA women?" I'm not sure I understand.

Tue Feb 14, 11:32:00 AM  
Blogger Unsaid said...

hmmm...of course dating around was never too expensive for me (doing my pimp laugh now)...kidding, yeah i didn't look at it like that.

YAY on you getting the book!

Tue Feb 14, 11:43:00 AM  
Blogger Cool AC said...

You are not the only one who has that Law. It happens to me too, and in the end I end up with nothing. I think it is something about the hormes you emit when you are "in love" or "deep like" or whatever. They are a positive vibe, and people are attracted to that. You know how they say a woman or man in love has a glow? Well, you are glowing, so people are walking to the light! :) I hope you figure out which one is best for you. My advice would be to go with the one who makes you laugh!

Tue Feb 14, 04:23:00 PM  
Blogger Accomplice said...

i don't do set up or blind dates. they are a recipe for disaster.

i don't know how old girl who is flyin in is going to feel about you most recent post. my thing is just be honest with people.

Wed Feb 15, 09:41:00 AM  
Blogger T. Cas said...

@ cool ac - glad to hear i'm not the only one who goes through this. Everything will become in clear in time.

@ accomplice- you are right, she didnt like that shit at all. But I have been honest with her, and this post was in meant in that spirit. In retrospect, it might not have been the right thing to do.

Wed Feb 15, 10:09:00 AM  
Blogger Mocha_Grl said...

It's funny how you can go from 'nobody' to 'too many bodies', in a short amount of time. My theory on the Law is this... you meet one person who's so right in so many ways, but as nobody is perfect, you'll always meet someone who'll bring to the table what they're missing. Whether it's good convo, good humour, or a big booty ;). Maybe it's a good thing they all came at once. It'll make you really understand what qualities are most important to you.

Mon Feb 20, 11:11:00 AM  

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