Tuesday, September 19, 2006

The Blog Real World: What's Next!?!?

The Blog Real World: What’s Next!?!?

The roommates gather at the round table in the dining room to deliberate. As usual, Nikki is the first to speak.

Nikki: So what we gonna do about them clowns? They obviously can’t go around hitting people.

Nsane: They didn’t hit on shit. That was the worst fight I ever seen. I used to beat them fast ass boys off me better than that when I was 12.

Rob Mack: We can’t get rid of them. Those are my blogger big brothers.

Missy: But we all signed a non violence agreement. Can we just ignore that?

Liquor: I say we keep them around to see if they actually land a blow next time.

Nikki: Sometimes people mess up. We gotta give them a second chance.

Rob Mack: If they leave, then who are we gonna get? What are our options?

Nsane: It’ll probably be some guys. Maybe Boss Mack?

Liquor: Noo. He’ll be tryna pimp us out. Maybe one of the gay bloggers out there?

Rob Mack: I ain’t going for that. I’ll take my chances with T and KZ.

Nikki: Maybe one of those sexy poet types. I can totally get with that.

Missy: Do you really wanna wake up every morning to a sonnet? I think we have to keep the ones we have now.

Nsane: They need to go. Not because I’m scared they gonna fight again, but because them dudes aint got no heart.

Nikki: Okay, lets take a vote.

Dramatic music plays, and the camera circles around the round table. You see hands go up, but don’t know whether they are voting to kick T. and KZ out or to keep them. Miss Ahmad enters the room.

Miss Ahmad: I understand that you have come to a decision?

Nikki: Yes, we have.

Miss Ahmad: (talking on her headset): Will you send KZ and T. Cas in the room?

The defendants walk in the room humbly. They look at the roommates, who do not acknowledge their gazes.

Miss Ahmad: Your roommates have made up their minds. I’ll let them tell you their decision. Nikki, I believe you are going to speak for the group?

Nikki: Yes, I am… Fellas, what you have done is reprehensible. I can’t believe that you jeopardized your standing in the house for a petty fight. It was completely uncalled for. We voted and by a majority decision of 3-2, we have decided…

Commercial Break

Confessional Video:
T. Cas: Whatever happens, happens. I have enjoyed my time on The Real World and I have gotten to know these 6 people very well. If I have to go, then I’ll go with no regrets.

Resume Scene

Nikki: You punk ass mofos can stay!!!


Upbeat ska music plays and the roommates all hug and rejoice jubilantly.

T. Cas: Thank you guys very much. I promise it wont happen again.

KZ: Which 2 of you bastards voted against me?

Rob Mack: It don’t even matter. You are here, now lets celebrate.

Miss Ahmad: This seems like an appropriate time to reveal this years vacation spot. The 7 of you are going on an all expense paid trip to the Bahamas. Pack your stuff, the plane leaves in the morning.

Confessional Video:
Liquor: I usually like to take my vacations by myself. But I can’t turn down the islands. All that rum, all those men. I’m about to get my groove back.

The roommates continue their celebration. The music turns from Ska to a generic form of Reggae music and the scene fades out.

END SCENE

The next morning, the roommates are at the airport. There are scenes of them schlepping their luggage and going through security checks. They board the plane bound for the Bahamas. The next scene shows the plane landing and has scenic shots of the blue water, the beach and Islanders doing island things, like picking coconuts and a crowded marketplace. The roommates settle in their hotel rooms and then meet at the bar outside the hotel.

Confessional Video:
Missy: I can’t wait to hit the beach. I got 3 new bathing suits to try out. I hope the guys down here are ready for me. I’m bringing the sexy back.


Rob Mack: So what are we gonna do today?

Liquor: I don’t know about you all, but I’m just trying to chill out at the beach.


Nsane: You think they got some fire island weed out here? I’m tryna get blazed.

T. Cas: I’m down for whatever. This is the first time I ever left the states. I want to take it all in.

Nikki: Let’s find the real Bahamas! I mean where the people are disenfranchised and underserved. We can make a difference out here.

KZ: I’m all for that. But lets find some women first. Where did Missy go?

Nsane: I don’t see her. She was right
here.

The roommates look around but can’t find Missy. They split up and begin to search. Nikki and Rob Mack go one way. KZ and Liquor go another and T. Cas and Nsane goe off in a different direction.

Rob Mack: Where do you think she went?

Nikki: I don’t know but she probably doing her own thing. Every now and then you gotta just do you!

Rob Mack: I know but we came as a group, we should hang as a group
.

CUT SCENE

KZ: I don’t know why we even looking for her. Missy is a grown ass woman.

Liquor: You’re right. Let’s hit the bar.

CUT SCENE

T. Cas: Let’s be real. You and Missy been hanging tighter than gnat booty for the whole time we have been in the house.

Nsane: What are you saying?

T. Cas: You know what’s up with Missy, don’t you?

Nsane: She just dipped out, I don’t know where she went.

T. Cas: Did you…

Nsane: Did we what?

T. Cas: Are you..

Nsane: Stop beating around the bush and ask what you wanna ask. You been implying it for weeks.

T. Cas: Are y’all doing each other? Maybe you had a fight and she left.

Nsane: I fucking knew it!!! No, we ain’t gay. We just friends. You horny muhfuckas try to make everything so dirty.

T. Cas: I had to ask…Sorry!


Confessional Video:
T. Cas: Shit, I had to ask. They been disappearing together for the whole time. I thought there was some HLA (hot les.bian action) going on. I guess I was wrong. Is it strange that I’m a little disappointed?

Confessional Video:
Rob Mack: I just want to know where Missy is. I hope she is all right wherever she is. I’m starting to get worried.

The camera takes a wide angle shot of the beach. The sun is setting. We zoom in and catch a glimpse of Missy. She is walking down the shore with a tall dreadlocked brother. She is wearing a blue bikini top and a sarong. The camera fades to black…

COMMERCIAL BREAK

It was written...

22 Comments:

Blogger i like liquor and tv said...

rofl@Boss Mack will probably try to pimp us out...too funny.

lol@Missy finding someone already.

this is too funny.

Tue Sep 19, 08:58:00 AM  
Blogger thee modern isis said...

lol@ they running around looking for Missy.

She wasn't lost.. she knew exactly what she was doin'.

Lovin' it Cas.

Tue Sep 19, 09:13:00 AM  
Blogger Miz JJ said...

Time to get some lovin' going on in the Real World Blog edition. Go Missy!

Tue Sep 19, 10:11:00 AM  
Blogger TTD said...

damn missy only been there 2 min & she getting her freak on already!?!? lol

Tue Sep 19, 10:57:00 AM  
Blogger 1969 said...

Missy had an agenda. Nothing wrong with that. Just don't go Natalee Hollaway on us.

Tue Sep 19, 11:10:00 AM  
Blogger 1969 said...

Oh yeah...and Rob Mack needs to get turned out by an Island Sister so he can reclaim his swagger. LOL

Tue Sep 19, 11:13:00 AM  
Blogger 1969 said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Tue Sep 19, 11:13:00 AM  
Blogger Knockout Zed said...

This is some outstanding writing, dude! I thought you might write in some adventure that helps T Cas and KZ bond, like fighting a Decepticon. You know, the Decepticon that turns from a Butterfli to a Snake?

KZ

Tue Sep 19, 11:26:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

T Cas you trip me out. I'm weak as hell that you know what a sarong is. LMAO

Tue Sep 19, 01:30:00 PM  
Blogger Little Brown Girl said...

Zed BE NICE!!!

This was funny...I hope Missy gets some cause the rest of the roomates ain't tryin too yet. Ok why is it all about sex with me??? Own't know but somebody better have some and quick!

Tue Sep 19, 01:55:00 PM  
Blogger onefromphilly said...

ZED cut it out!!!! why can't y'all be Tranformers??..HA!

T Cas: lovin it, keep it going

Tue Sep 19, 02:19:00 PM  
Blogger A.u.n.t. Jackie said...

excellent episode. i'm glad to be a producer on your blogisode..i really am:-)

now let's see who get drunk and arrested outside of the country!

Tue Sep 19, 02:37:00 PM  
Blogger ChezNiki said...

THAT'S WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT! Go Missy! Its Your Birthday! LOL

This is fantastic!

...did I miss the shower scene??!?

LMBBAO!

Tue Sep 19, 02:42:00 PM  
Blogger Phoenix said...

this was great. You should add some survior type challenge in there - one of the group gets lost and the rest have to go out on a raft to a small deserted island to find the missing person.......

Tue Sep 19, 04:13:00 PM  
Blogger P said...

Bravo, as usual, Cas.

I nominate you for the Blemmy awards (Blog Emmy).

As you know, our appetites are insatiable. We want more. . .

Tue Sep 19, 04:28:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This was another great episode! I can't wait to see what happens with Missy and "Dexter St. Jock" lol

Tue Sep 19, 07:43:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just ready everyones comments and I'm cracking up. I just read what Rob Mack said about stressin over Missy. I WAS wondering about that. I guess we're on the same page with the dexter comment. I guess I'm not the only one that remembers Eddie Murphy's "RAW" lol

Tue Sep 19, 07:47:00 PM  
Blogger Nika Laqui said...

*lol@ 1969....

RobMack, I ain't even know who was gone get kicked out either....I hope some Island girl to freak you out...*lol*
*lol* @ Dexter St. Jock and you being lamed out....

T. this is kinda scary how you almost got me to a T.

"They didn’t hit on shit. That was the worst fight I ever seen. I used to beat them fast ass boys off me better than that when I was 12."

Try 3rd grade....*lol*

LOL @ L&TV "gay bloggers" and "BossMack tryna pimp us out"....

I was thinking we get a gay blogger....

I know some sex gone happen at the Bahamas....

This is hilarious, my son and father are over here asking me "Whats so funny?"

Tue Sep 19, 10:12:00 PM  
Blogger Rashan Jamal said...

@ liquor and tv - glad you like it, you not tired of this yet?

@ thee modern isis - they asked for some hookups, now they got them

@ Trizzy - was that sarcasm? LOL

@ miz jj- missy aint the only one who gonna get it. stay tuned

@ 1969 - that's a great idea.. Rob Mack prepared to get some island lovin'

@ KZ - I literally laughed out loud reading that comment. The decepticon???

@ Rob Mack - you ain't lamed out, you are concerned. And when I was writing it, I was thinking about Dexter St Jock. I saw Raw the other day.

@ anon - yeah, I know what a sarong is, dont know if I spelled it right though

@ Royce's Daughter - don't tell Zed to be nice. LOL Sex and violence make the reality show. I'll be sure to add some in the next episode.

@ onefromphilly - I got about 2 more of these posts in me before I have to move on

@ miss ahmad - thanks for letting me use you in this, although I didnt ask. Drunk shenanigans coming up

@ negropino - You would leave us? you tell me what kind of bikini you want to wear and i'll write it in.

@ chezniki - no shower scene...yet

@ phoenix - i have never seen survivor so I wouldnt know where to start, but maybe a challenge

@ P - can we call them the bloggies? blemmies sounds like something that comes from a smokers lungs.

@ The Goddess - you caught the dexter reference too?

@nsane - I pay attention when I read your blogs. I tried to make the characters as real as possible.

Wed Sep 20, 12:44:00 AM  
Blogger Angel said...

@ 1969: i swear i was thinking the SAME thing about natalee holloway! missy better take a buddy or leave some bread crumbs or some shyt!

@ zeddy: hell naw for the damn "decepticons!" dammit yall are HEE-LARRY-TEE!!!!

like they say on most songs nowadays, "sir cas, you a fool for this one boy!" LMAO!

Wed Sep 20, 01:47:00 AM  
Blogger NegroPino™ said...

I wanna be in a PINK Rocawear 2 piece bikini..how bout that?

Wed Sep 20, 08:37:00 AM  
Blogger Ms.Honey said...

All I know is I'm tryin to be up in the sun LOL..getting my groove back with some dreadloced brotha

Fri Sep 22, 10:03:00 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home