I Remember..

Have you ever woke up in the morning with someone on your mind? That happened to me this morning. My homeboy, Kareem is weighing heavy on me. I haven't seen or heard from him in over four years. This morning, I had a feeling that I can't really explain. A feeling that something was wrong, that I need to find out what happened to him. Kareem was more than just my homeboy, he was my brother from another mother, a true friend. You probably have noticed that he is in all my stories from the past. We were inseparable since the 7th grade, but unfortunate circumstances made me distance myself from him. I often wonder if I made the right decision. I remember all of what we have been through together, the good, the bad and the ugly.

I remember when we first met in 7th grade chorus. He made fun of my British Knights and stole my pencils from my bookbag.

I remember playing Tecmo Bowl at each others houses. I remember him screaming"Christian Okoye is a beast" when the Nigerian Nightmare was running over people.

I remember his obsession with the Dallas Cowboys, from Hershcel to Emmitt to Michael Irvin.

I remember sitting in the bleachers of the high school football game reciting The Symphony. My favorite was Big Daddy Kane and his favorite was Kool G Rap.

I remember when we both had our first real girlfriends.

I remember when he transferred to another school, but we still stayed in touch and hung out every weekend.

I remember when me, Kareem and Ashley used to go to the Tara Cinemas with some smuggled Pringles and sodas in our pockets. I remember hanging out outside the Wal Mart cuz we didnt have anywhere else to go.

I remember Godfather's pizza and Starcastle Arcade on Friday nights.

I remember football and basketball with the boys.

I remember the Sega Genesis wars: Bill Walsh College Football and the early Madden years and the well placed fart to distract me when I was about to score.

I remember Freaknik and Orange Crush and Player's Ball.

I remember Norfolk State and Savannah State.

I remember double dating. Me and Lisa and him and Sameka. Or me and Lisa and him and Chandra.

I remember that New Years eve 95. That was the best double date we ever had. Cooked for the ladies, popped some champagne, candle light dinner, the whole nine.

I remember that we burned down his mother's crib that night, too. That was the worst wake up call I ever got. "Hey man, come get me. My crib burned down" I thought he was fucking with me until I heard the sirens.

I remember that afternoon watching college football and videos. That was the day Tupac's California Love video came out.

I remember that first time we smoked out together. I copped a nickel bag from Rodney at work and we rolled it up in my VW fox with Tori. It was my first time and I didnt get high.

I remember when Tori got the dru hill hair color and we viewed him as "suspect"

I remember us making up new slang all the time and watching it spread across the city.

I remember that day Kareem copped Raekwon's Cuban Linx joint and was so excited he came to my job to let me hear it. We sat in the car blazing a j and vibing out to "the purple tape"

I remember discovering Nas, Biggie, Outkast, WuTang etc together

I remember the freestyle battles: I remember our format. 1st verse - battle rap. 2nd verse - weed rap. 3rd verse - rap about the girls. We kicked rhymes while Tori would sing the hooks. We used to murder the instrumentals.

I remember the E&J, the cisco, md 20/20, the Barton's Gin, Alize, all the cheap ass drinks... and then later the higher end stuff like the Henny, the Grand Marnier, etc.

I remember being crushed that night I saw him and Tori sniffing that powder for the first time. That was heartbreaking to me given my father's history with drugs.

I remember that night Kareem did an inadvertant cock block when Andria came over. Nigga wouldnt leave for shit. I cursed that muhfucka out for that one.

I remember when he got my friend LB pregnant. I remember their tempestous relationship. I remember his beautiful daughter Destiny.

I remember that trip to ATL during Hurricane Floyd. Kareem and my girl smoking dro while I was driving listening to Eightball and MJG. Then us balling out at the Gentlemans Club and the Shark Bar like we were rich or something.

I remember when them feds came at us... andwhen we thought our phones were tapped.

I remember that first time he got locked up and my broke ass bailed him out.

I remember the second time he got locked up and I couldnt afford the bail.

I remember that discussion about what the cocaine was doing to him outside of Turtle Creek apartments

I remember the domestic violence conversation outside of his girl's crib.

I remember when his baby mama's crib got broke into and I just knew it was him.

I remember when Kareem and Tori hid out from the cops at my crib.

I remember when Kareem and Tori got arrested around the corner from my crib for some dumb drug induced shit.

I remember when he stayed at my crib cuz he had no place else to go.

I remember when he smelled like a crackhead on my living room couch.

I remember when I had to put him out b/c I was living with my girl.

I remember when I had to make the decision to distance myself from him. The addiction was just too much for me to bear.

I remember when I heard he was actually in prison for a year. I remember seeing him when he got out. He was clean and reenergized.

I remember the last time I talked to him on the phone. He was going to visit a girl in Connecticut. He was going to call me back in 3 days when he got back.

I remember he never did, and he never answered his phone, and then it was disconnected.

I remember calling his mom and her telling me that he was locked up again.

I remember checking the department of corrections website to see when he got out. A 3 year bid.

I remember writing a letter to him while he was locked up, but never sending it.

I remember it all...

I need to find him.

It was written...