Friday, August 18, 2006

Let's Get Married/The Freaks Come Out At Night

Inspiration - "Let's Get Married" Jagged Edge and "The Freaks Come Out At Night" - Whodini

What I'm Listening To - EPMD "Unfinished Business"

Question(s) I Asked Myself Today - "This is crazy, right? That's the only explanation."

Let's Get Married

Peace Blogger fam. What's good with ya? I took a vacation day today because I got the rehearsal and dinner for my brother's wedding. The wedding is Saturday and I have put myself at his disposal tomorrow. Whatever he needs, I'm there for him. I think that means I'll be a chauffeur/errand boy tomorrow. Personally, I am ready. I picked up my tux today and I must say I was looking pretty suave, if I say so myself. I'll be sure to take and post pictures if Blogger lets me. All I got left to do is get a haircut and think of something to say in my toast, but I might just freestyle that. I do better when I don't plan stuff out. For those that are wondering, I still haven't given my brother any money, but I probably will give him some cash instead of something off the registry as a wedding gift. They probably can use that more than he can use a crockpot or a waffle iron.

I was checking the itinerary and it should make for a very "interesting" wedding reception. I will have to to try hard not to be sarcastic and mocking. It might be hard if I'm around my sister. We have the same sense of humor and I can just see us cracking wise at my mother crying all day or the gospel singers oversinging ala Beyonce or Mary. Tenacious, if I can clown my own brother's wedding imagine what I would do to you. LOL. Regardless of how much I joke, it will be good to see all my family gathered for the wedding. That's not to say that I won't need a strong drink after the day is over. It's going to be a dry wedding. My brother is a minister and he didn't even let me take him to a booty club for a bachelor party. Maybe I'll stop off at the liquor store and get me some of those little airplane bottles.

The first person who asks me when I am getting married is liable to catch a cuss-out or an open handed slap to the mouth. Like I need you to remind me that my little brother is getting married before me. Unless of course its my grandmother. She can say whatever she wants, whenever she wants. I love that woman to death. I don't even trip when she forwards me religious emails every morning. I hate those, but Grandma got me in the palm of her hand so she got it like that. I need to see if I still have some of those in my deleted emails, so I can truthfully say to her that I read them.

The Freaks Come Out At Night

I went out this morning around 3 AM. I needed to get some stuff from Wal Mart and clean out my car for a change. I should have stayed home. Whodini wasn't lying when they said the freaks come out at night. First off, I was expecting nobody to be on the streets, but I forgot that Vega$ Nights lets out at 3. How do you get caught in traffic that early in the morning? And people were on some drunk driving shit. I almost got bammed up twice in less than a mile. I started to just turn around and go home, but I figured I was already out and I would be ripping and running (stole that from you, Trizzy) all day tomorrow, so I might as well finish my errands. As I was leaving Wal Mart, I got approached by a Mexican panhandler. Dude was begging for change in Spanish. That was the first time I had experienced that. Shit, the only word I understood was "dinero." I gave him a couple of quarters so he would leave me alone and then drove back towards the crib.

I stopped at the Quik Trip to get some gas and get some of the trash out of my ride. I'm pumping my gas, and its now about 4 AM. I see something fly past my face and its a damn locust or something. It was huge, I wish I had my camera so I could show you just how big it was. It was about the size of my hand. Even worse, it decided that it wanted to post up on top of my whip. I tried throwing shit at it, but it wouldn't budge. I used the windshield wiper water to try to move it, but it didn't work. I finally just gave up and got in the car and drove off. I didn't get to vacuum the car out like I planned. When I got home, the locust was still attached to the top of my car; for all I know its still there.

Its now 6:30 AM, and I haven't been to sleep yet, so I'm gonna go catch a couple of hours of shuteye before I start my long day. I may not make it to everyone's blogs until Sunday, depending on how much stuff I gotta do. I hope you all have a great weekend, and I'll holla at y'all Monday. Eh, who am I kidding? I'll probably post something Sunday. My obsession with my blog is ridiculous. One!

It was written...


Blogger Ms. Blaize said...

Yeah, it's true. Grandma's can say almost anything and get away with it. It's some Black rule that we got stuck with. The opposite race will tell their Grandma's to shut up. My Grandmother is still quick on the draw and would hit me with a shoe and have it fly right back to her hand before I got a chance to enhale if I tried that nonsense. I know..... my lil cousin has a knot in her head to prove it! PLUS, she holds it down ans has always had my utmost respect!
But all I know is when it's my turn to be old, I BETTER get the same treatment! I mean, I'm talkin' there better be some "payin' it forward" kinda deal going on!!! Shoot, if we aren't going to have Social Security then we should at least be able to say what we want!

As for your trip out to Wal-Mart at 3 in the morning, I'm sorry but if your butt decided to go up on Cobb Parkway at 3AM in the morning then you were only looking for trouble! Especially since there was a Walmart further south that you could have gone too! So I will play amateur psychologist and guess that you just wanted to see what was up with those chicks walking back across the street to get into their cars!

So... how many numbers did you get? :-)

From Tha' One,

~Jaine Blaize

Fri Aug 18, 07:59:00 AM  
Blogger thee modern isis said...

lol@ jaine.

I'm sure you'll find plenty of blog material after the wedding.

and who are you kidding? You might as well carry a small container of baby powder to smack the hell out of people.. cause you are going to get asked about your marriage plans by everyone's "mama nem"

Fri Aug 18, 08:28:00 AM  
Blogger nikki said...

i gotta come back and read that long ass post. in the meanwhile, just wanted to send blessings your family's way. here's hoping the wedding is pulled off without a hitch and the time together is beautiful and cherished. weddings are hectic and can sometimes bring out the worst in folk. your brother and his bride and others are probably gonna be trippin because of the sheer massiveness of the endeavor, so just let that shit roll off of your back and keep it moving. good luck, and i know you're gonna represent as best man.

Fri Aug 18, 08:58:00 AM  
Blogger chele said...

The locust rode all the way to your house???? What the hell?

I hope you have a great time at the wedding. Can't wait to see the pics.

Fri Aug 18, 09:07:00 AM  
Blogger i like liquor and tv said...

I assume that you have a flask. Fill that mugg up and slip it in the inside of your suit jacket pocket. Make sure you fill it up with something STRONG, because flasks only hold a couple of shots.

I used to live down the street from Vegas Nights too. As a matter of fact, after I finished bartending school up the street from there, I went to Vegas Nights for a bartending job, but for some reason the owner (some tall mid eastern looking man), kept pushing for me to be a cocktail waitress.

Fri Aug 18, 09:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Diva (in Demand) said...

Have fun, look sexy as usual, and most importantly BEHAVE YOURSELF. I can't wait to read all about it.

And tell them I said to start on time!

Fri Aug 18, 09:38:00 AM  
Blogger Tenacious said...

awww T, I'm sure you look very suave in your tux...please dont seduce any of the least not in the church...before the ceremony, cant be taking pictures hair all messed up and dress wrinkled...eww its could have been a locust or a chicada(sp?) those b*tches are huge but they hatch I think every 8-9 years I think. Yeah random fact for the day.

Come on now T, I'm going to clown at my own wedding, and sh*t my whole family is coming so you know some sh*t is bound to go down...talkin' bout where's the dominoes tables and bar? *sigh* yes all of my family events involve a dominoes table and some dranks...too bad none of that is going on over here, bound to be a family uproar and voting me off the wedding party LOL

@T, I had a much better night, I'm smiles and giggles again. Yeah I just needed a good night's sleep and a lil' wall thumping. You must know me well...I won't sleep away my weekend in Chicago, I'll actually get out and get stalked by an ex or something,

Fri Aug 18, 09:56:00 AM  
Blogger onefromphilly said...

Also be prepared for a whole lot of momma's giving you their nice single daughter or neice's phone number. They would just love to meet a nice handsome single man like you. Don't you know, you gonna be like fresh meat, HA! Just take the numbers with a smile and keep your punch spiked, you'll get through it. But don't drink until after you make the toast, they'll be video tape of this event! LOL Enjoy, tell little brother CONGRATS!!!

Fri Aug 18, 10:02:00 AM  
Blogger Mocha_Grl said...

I'm with Chele...this locust was determined to become your pet! It followed you all the way home?

Anyway best wishes to your lil bro'. I mean shit, just cuz the idea of marriage terrifies me don't mean it can't work for him! LOL

Fri Aug 18, 10:04:00 AM  
Anonymous The Goddess said...

Family is a trip; they always manage doing something that will drive you to drink. I can handle them all of two minutes, literally! Hope all goes well. I'm sure you'll have a good time.

Oh, and it looks like you got yourself another stalker. The Locust. Haaa! Ok, I'm corny, I know. But the visual of you throwing stuff at your car is hilarious!

Fri Aug 18, 10:27:00 AM  
Blogger Miz JJ said...

I had a great time at the wedding I attended, but a dry wedding. Is there going to be dancing allowed? Have fun!

Fri Aug 18, 11:15:00 AM  
Blogger 4EverJennayNay said...

There is no safe time to go to wal-mart. If you go during normal hours you will want to shoot someone or even yourself. At night the crazy people are let loose.

Good luck with the wedding stuff. Have a good weekend.

Fri Aug 18, 11:18:00 AM  
Blogger Nika Laqui said...

I can't believe you are up this early....or were up that early...

I hate the Holy Moly emails as well, I delete them automatically....I tell people I hate those and they still send them...

Fri Aug 18, 11:18:00 AM  
Blogger NegroPino™ said...

Thats why u shoulda stayed yo ass at home

Fri Aug 18, 11:31:00 AM  
Blogger ----- said...

Definitely crazy...

Tell "flower child" to get that ish together! :D

Have fun "rehearsing" today...and don't clown too hard tomorrow!!

Stay close,


Fri Aug 18, 01:47:00 PM  
Blogger Miss Ahmad said...

my sister got married before was awesome! now we have somewhere to eat for thanksgiving dinner!

Fri Aug 18, 09:00:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Spanish dude cant be too upset. You didnt understand him and you still gave him money.

Sat Aug 19, 01:09:00 AM  
Blogger *snake*bite* said...

The more you tell people that you don't want a certain email, i find double the amount get sent to my inbox from that person.
Don't wear urself out bein errand boy, on the other hand it should be fun!!
That locust was determined to claim your ride, eeeww!
I'm with goddess on the visual - lol, v.funny!
Spanish dude got game to get some papers - lol!
As for the wedding n the celebrations - with all those mums n ma's you are gonna be in a sea of lets say locusts lookin to cling on! Good luck!
Just smile and wave.
Congrats to the family for the celebrations tho!

Sun Aug 20, 10:55:00 AM  

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