Wednesday, September 27, 2006

The Blog Real World: The Aftermath

The Blog Real World: The Aftermath

Tivo: Episode 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

Back From Commercial

The four roommates have a looks of trepidation on their faces as the police officers approach. T. Cas starts slowly inching away trying to separate himself from the others.

Confessional Video:
Liquor: Was I scared? Yeah, I was scared. And don't think I didn't see T. trying to leave us. I wouldn't have been surprised if he snitched us out to save his own skin.

Resume Scene

Police Officer: Hey, you! Stop right there!

T. Cas: Who me?

Police Officer: Yeah, you. I wanna ask you some questions.

T. Cas: What’s the deal, Mr. Officer?

Police Officer: We got a call about a disturbance in the club. Any of you know anything about that?


Silence.

Police Officer: Well, what do you know?

Liquor: We were just hanging out here. I don’t know what happened.

KZ: That’s right. We were just minding our own. Then we heard a ruckus.

Police Officer: Did you see who was fighting?

Nsane: I ain’t seen shit! (under her breath) Pig!

Police Officer: What was that, Miss?

Nsane: Sorry, sir. I didn’t see anything.

Police Officer: Are you Americans?

T. Cas: Yeah, we just down here on vacation. Can we go now? We are about to meet some friends on the beach.


Garbled radio transmissions emanate from a 2nd cop’s radio. He grabs the speaker and says.

2nd Police Officer: 10-4. Gary, we have to go. We have a situation upstairs in room 112

KZ: That’s our…

T. Cas: Shh!

Police Officer: You all can go now. Stay out of trouble.

Liquor: Thanks officer. Be safe, son!

Police Officer: Did you just call me son?

2nd Police Officer: Not now, Gary. Let’s roll.

The police officers walk in the hotel lobby leaving T. Cas, KZ, Nsane and Liquor outside.

Confessional Video:
Nsane: You gotta know how to deal with the police. They basically just some lames with a badge on a power trip. They always tryna hold us down. Fuck them jumpouts.

Resume Scene

Nsane: That was a close one. Five – O almost hemmed us up.

KZ: Why they going to our room? Cas, you ain’t got no contraband do you?

T. Cas: Nah, I ain’t smoked no weed since April 24th, 1999. I’m good.

Liquor: Must be Robert. Should we go see what’s up?

KZ: Nah, the cop saw us. I’m sure Mack’ll be aiight.


A scooter pulls up and Nikki hops off.

Nikki: Thanks, brother. That was enlightening.

Island Guy: (indecipherable Patois)

Nikki: I’m definitely gonna call you.

Island Guy: (indecipherable Patois)

Nikki: My number? Uhhh… yeah, I don’t ever keep my phone on, but the number is 777-9311.

The Island Guy drives off and Nikki joins her roommates.

T. Cas: Who the hell was that?

Nikki: Awww, ain’t nobody. Evidently, these island brothas ain’t about shit. He thought I was gonna fuck him and I just met him.

KZ: Did you? And if you did, did you tape it?

Nikki: Horny Bastid!

Nsane: Did you find Missy while you was gallivanting around the island?

Nikki: She ain’t back yet? I hope she having better luck than I did. How about Mack? Last I seen that brother was down on the beach.

Liquor: The cops on their way to the guys room now. I don’t know what’s going on.

Nikki: Word? I hope Mack aiight. Why you ain’t go check it out?

Nsane: We had to throw some blows with these chickens in the hotel club. Cops might still be looking for us.

T. Cas: Yeah, but they don’t know what you look like. Why don’t you go check it out for us? Room 112.

Nikki: Aiight, I’m on my way. Don’t go nowhere. I’ll be right back.


The camera follows Nikki as she walks in the hotel lobby. She walks around the corner and sees 2 police officers outside Room 112.

Nikki: Yo, that’s my homeboy’s room. What’s going on?

Police Officer: What’s your name, girly?

Nikki: I’m Nikki. What’s going on?

Police Officer: You know a Nikki? (pauses) You can go in
.

Nikki walks in the room and sees Rob Mack sitting in a chair with an ice pack applied to his head. Missy is sitting on the bed adjacent to Rob Mack.

Nikki: Yo!!! Missy, where da hell you been? We been looking all over for you.

Missy: I was…

Nikki: The fuck is going on here, Mack. Someone beat your ass?

Rob Mack: I got set up. I was chillin with this honey when 3 guys busted in the room.

Confessional Video:
Nikki: When I walked in the room it was like all hell broke loose. I mean, the room was straight ransacked and my man Rob Mack had a Flintstone lump on the side of his head. I’m glad Missy was there for him. But where the hell was she all day, anyway? Remind me to interrogate her ass about that.

Resume Scene

Missy: I came to see what everyone was doing and I saw Rob handcuffed to the bed. They had already left by the time I got here, but they cleaned the room out.

Rob Mack: Yeah, it was messed up. But at least I got some pussy out of it.

Nikki: You fucked? Man, I’m jealous!

Rob Mack: Nikki, you left me on the beach to hang with The Mighty Quinn. Was it worth it? Did you at least get some?

Nikki: Nah, that brotha was trife. I couldn’t understand a fucking word he was saying. I’m totally sorry that you got jacked, Mack.

Rob Mack: I told you. We come together, we leave together. I should have known something like this would happen.

Nikki: Dude, I said I’m sorry. Let that shit go! Somebody need to go tell the others what’s happening.

Missy: I’ll go. Where are they?

Rob Mack: HELL NO!!! You ain’t going nowhere. You the whole reason we broke up in the first place. Who the hell did you meet so quick anyway?

Missy: My friend was down here on vacation too. I saw him when we were checking in.

Nikki: You fuck, too??? Damn, ya’ll did your thing.

Missy: Just because I was chillin with that Negro, don’t mean I was doing him. Why come you be all up in my shit?

Nikki: Yeah, right! We’ll see on the reunion special. I know they had that night vision shit watching you
.

The other 4 roommates come to the door.

T. Cas: Damn, what happened here?

Rob Mack: Long story, I’ll tell you about it later.

Police Officer: We meet again. Is this your room?

KZ: Yeah, this is our abode. Is Mack all right?

Police Officer: He’ll be fine. I need for you all to check your belongings and see if anything was stolen. Come by the station in the morning and we’ll take your report.


Confessional Video:
T. Cas: I'm not really trying to go down to the station. Whatever they took, just charge it to the game. Last thing I need is to have to come back down to the Bahamas to testify against some island syndicate. Just let me go home. This shit is bananas, yo!

Resume Scene

The police officers leave and the roommates gather for a pow wow in the guys room. The camera shows Rob Mack talking and the sound cuts in at the end of his speech.

Rob Mack: … and that’s what happened. Go ahead and clown me if you want.

KZ: Shit, I ain’t gonna clown you. I’m gonna congratulate you, homey. You was the first one to get some moisture this trip.

T. Cas: Hell yeah, You the man, Mack!!!

Liquor: (laughing) You guys are sick.

Confessional Video:

KZ: Man, Mack's forehead was swole up like Hasim Rahman. He got beat up, but at least he got a chance to beat up some pussy!

Resume Scene

Nsane: Man, some crazy shit done went down in the Bahamas. We need to go home.

Nikki: We just got here and you ready to go.

Nsane: What if the cops figure out we were the ones fighting in the club? I got warrants, nigga!

T. Cas: I feel that. At some point, you gotta recognize the warning signs. I mean, Liquor and Nsane fighting in the club. Missy disappearing, Rob Mack getting jacked.

Liquor: For the record, I wasn’t fighting.

T. Cas: I saw you throw that bottle on the sly. I ain’t never known you to waste some alcohol.

Liquor: Well, the bottle was empty.

KZ: Aiight, I guess we gotta take a vote. All in favor of staying say “yeaaaah boyeee” and all in favor of leaving say “Audi 5000”

Confessional Video:
Missy: I am having a good time. I’m not trying to leave yet. There’s so much more to do down here. Besides, my friend is supposed to take me to brunch tomorrow. I hope my roommates don’t make us leave. I got a new 2 piece for tomorrow that’s sessy as hell.

Resume Scene

The camera rolls back and reveals a long lens view of the roommates and goes out the open hotel room door. The door closes and the final camera shot reveals Room 112. Fade to Black.

Commercial Break

It was written...

23 Comments:

Blogger Nika Laqui said...

I ain't got no damn warrants...

As a matter of fact, I got to take a written test to be a 911/311 operator...so techinically, if I get hired, I'll be a pig too...without the badge..

I'm just glad I didn't get locked up...

And I see how you do...you'll just leave a nigga...

But I'm not ready to go, but we should STAY TOGETHER...this time..

Wed Sep 27, 07:24:00 AM  
Blogger The Stiltwalker said...

Given I don't feel like reading back thru parts 1- 8 billion, I'm lost. Write about something else.

Wed Sep 27, 08:27:00 AM  
Blogger i like liquor and tv said...

lol@this. lol@the dudes giving him props for getting some, even though he got robbed. That fool better check for his passport.

lol@777-9311
lol@Yeah Boyeee/Audi 5000

Wed Sep 27, 08:49:00 AM  
Blogger TTD said...

what? kz tryna be flave w/ that “yeaaaah boyeee” - LMAO!!!

Wed Sep 27, 09:15:00 AM  
Blogger Ms.Honey said...

LOL...

on another note I wonder why they picked Mack to "jump" hmm interesting...

Wed Sep 27, 10:00:00 AM  
Blogger Blah Blah Blah said...

Zed actually said Yeaaah Boy? Was it like Craig's daddy...John Witherspoon?...LOL

Wed Sep 27, 10:36:00 AM  
Blogger 1969 said...

LOL@ 777-9311

TCas is crazy "YEEEAAAAHHH BOOOOYYYEEE"

Wed Sep 27, 10:43:00 AM  
Blogger sunshine said...

You missed your callin..

Wed Sep 27, 10:50:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You definitely gotta keep it going. This is some very interesting writing. And you were smart about it. You get my praises.

Wed Sep 27, 10:57:00 AM  
Blogger SandyBaby said...

LOL! I think they should stay on the island.

This is hilarious!

Wed Sep 27, 11:07:00 AM  
Blogger Tenacious said...

LOL...well @ least he got some....

Wed Sep 27, 11:17:00 AM  
Blogger NegroPino™ said...

Yall are killing me...I sense some HATERISM cuz me and the MACK got some....it prolly woulda been better if it was us 2 together getting some but then that would be too easy :)

SO who out the crew, got WARRANTS?

Wed Sep 27, 11:56:00 AM  
Blogger nikki said...

from what i've been able to gather from this series:

mack is the drama king
missy is getting (gr)ass
liq remains in a drunken stupor so she's always saying "i don't know what the fuck's going on"
kz has all the one-liners involving the acquisition of pussy and all things pussy related
nsane...see missy
and i'm the one who won't ever get any, at least not in this series. it would have been nice if mighty quinn had turned out to be amadeo. make it so. LOL

Wed Sep 27, 02:53:00 PM  
Blogger Knockout Zed said...

I talk about pussy an awful lot. Nothing like real life!

I actually do use a lot of old slang. At least that's what the skeezers say.

KZ

Wed Sep 27, 03:51:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man this keeps getting better and better. And they cant go home yet. I would be sooooo disappointed. I'm cracking up at the fool not picking up on 777-9311. I guess the Bahamians aren't familar with that song huh? LOL

Wed Sep 27, 04:01:00 PM  
Blogger A.u.n.t. Jackie said...

what you know about charging something to the game youngster?

Wed Sep 27, 04:41:00 PM  
Blogger i like liquor and tv said...

lol@me commenting during that last story that Rob Mack was about to get robbed. Next time pay attention to the drunken babbling Mack.

Wed Sep 27, 06:23:00 PM  
Blogger Mocha said...

I'm with Stilt. I know it's probably funny as hell from all the comments, but I'm too lazy to go back and read the first 7 parts...you know I got love for you rashan..but dang, can you send a girl a summary? Coles notes? Sumthin'?

Wed Sep 27, 06:34:00 PM  
Blogger Angel said...

POSITIVELY...
ABSOLUTELY...
DEAD...

at nikki saying her cell phone number was "777-9311!!!!!!!!!"

Wed Sep 27, 07:41:00 PM  
Blogger Rashan Jamal said...

@ the mistress - Thanks. I got a strange mind, thats how I come up with it.

@ Nika - Remember this is fiction, but yeah, I would leave your ass. I wouldnt snitch, but I'd bail

@ the stiltwalker - 2 more posts and then I'm done...

@ liquor and tv - you gave me the idea for Rob getting robbed. LOL

@ TTD - that was old school Flav, not minstrel show Flav

@ honey-libra - its like in the horror movies, if you have sex, then something bad happens.

@ blah, blah, blah - ummm...this is fiction. LOL but it was PE Flava Flav, not bang bang bang

@ 1969 - yeah, I'm crazy. I hope you like my insanity.

@ tjeanise - I found my calling again. I love writing this mess

@ negropino - I'm hating a little bit. I dont know who really got warrants, but its probably the one you least expect.

@ nikki - that about sums it up...

@ Robert Mack - I know you wouldnt really get beat up, it just made for a good story

@ KZ - LOL @ skeezers. Thats the second time I heard that in a week.

@ the goddess - I in no way meant that as a slur against the good people of the Bahamas. LOL

@ Miss Ahmad - youngster? I aint that much younger than you.

@ Rob Mack the sequel - Have I made a Love Connection? Missy and Mack? word?

@ Phoenix - no STDs in the blog real world. LOL

@ liquor part deux - See, I did steal that idea from you.

@ Mocha - thats what happens when you take unapproved blogging breaks. LOL

@ fallen - you like that? just random music thoughts floating around

@ Trizzy - Like I told Tjeanise, I'm gonna answer that call.
@

Wed Sep 27, 08:22:00 PM  
Blogger Single Ma said...

You still doing the damn thang!

Wed Sep 27, 09:22:00 PM  
Blogger NegroPino™ said...

SO ROb got the warrants? HE the only SQUARE one out the group

Fri Sep 29, 10:15:00 AM  
Blogger Elle Jefe said...

leave it to me to take a freaking hiatus and have to come back only to catch up with you doing a 8-parter! That shit is hilarious! You are the r.kelly of the blog world man! lmao!

Tue Oct 03, 03:07:00 PM  

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