Keep It Real (edited)

Inspiration - Any rap song from the mid 90's. Seriously, they wore that phrase out.

What I'm Listening To - Jay-Z - The Blueprint

Question(s) I Asked Myself Today- "Who will be the first one offended by the Keep it Real movement today?"

I got a new initiative for the day. I'm gonna keep it real with people today. No sugarcoating to avoid your hurt feelings. No saying what you wanna hear. No agreeing for the sake of avoiding an argument. I'm gonna just put it out there. Don't ask me nothing if you don't wanna know how I really feel.

For example, the chick at the job who always asks if I like her outfit is gonna hear the real. "You look like you auditioning to be a stripper."

The coworker who prefaces every statement with "This might be a stupid question" is going to hear: "That was a stupid question"

The friend who asks if I think her boyfriend is cheating on her, is gonna get dates, times, names, and if I have them pictures

I'm gonna slap the one who keeps asking to borrow money with a wad of $20 bills, and then throw a copy of a Suze Orman book at him/her.

The cat who wants me to listen to his demo: I'm gonna tell him that he should stop rapping and immediately enroll himself in some vocational classes, b/c he has no future as an entertainer.

The girl who asks if I'm listening to her is gonna get greeted with silence, b/c I won't be listening to her. I aint even gonna pretend.

When the colleague downstairs asks me to do something for him, I'm not going to do it. I'm gonna tell him that I have my own responsibilities, and he should do it himself.

I'm gonna ask why dude why he wearing cordoroy pants in the summer.

I'm gonna ask old girl why her makeup looks like she put in on while riding a rollercoaster.

I'm gonna ask why you can't stop talking to me all damn day. I might leave out the damn. I ain't decided yet.

This is either gonna be fun, or a keeping it real goes wrong moment. I'll let you know how it goes. And now, another meme courtesy of Superstar Nic. I'll try to answer this one with the same Keep it Real approach I'm gonna have today at work.

Who, What, Where, Why Meme

THE WHO'S
Who is in the house with you? Me, Myself and I (De La Soul, not Beyonce)
Who are you thinking about now? The girl who ain't call me back. Trying to figure that one out. How dare she?
Who did you last talk to on the phone? Jessica at 1 AM
Whose house did you last go to? It's been awhile but I think a couple of Sundays ago, I was at Chi-towns crib
Whose birthday is next? Today's my mother's bday
Who was the last person you had dinner with? It's been a while, but Collipark and Chi-town (pre fall out # 2)
Who do you hope will take this survey? Some of them non updating cats. LOL

THE WHAT'S
What was the last thing you ate? a tuna sammich
What was the last thing you drank? big ass cup of water
What color pants are you wearing? I'm not wearing any right now, need to get ready for work, but the blog comes first.
What is the first thing you think when you wake up? Where the f*ck is my phone so I can turn this alarm off?
What do you need right now? ChezNiki and Chele think I need some booty, but I think I need a vacation
What is the closest item near you that is blue?My mousepad
What are you wearing on your feet? socks
What instant messaging service do you use? yahoo
What is your favorite color? don't really have one, but I'll say whatever I look good in.
What is your most used away message? Invisible to everyone, I have seriously bad IM ettiquette. Half the time I forget to go available
What is your favorite website? Besides my blog, TV guide.com
What's your favorite shoe brand? I'm not a shoe/sneaker person.
What song do you currently hear? Kanye West - Celebration b/c my phone is ringing

THE WHERE'S
Where do you live? ATL, Gawja/what we do for ya/bull dogging hoez like them Georgetown Hoyas (Outkast - Rosa Parks)
Where is your phone? on top of my computer speaker
Where do you sleep? Most of the time in the bed, but sometimes the sofa.
Where did you get the shirt you're wearing? Walmart - just a white tee, yup in my white tee (Dem Franchise Boyz -White Tee)

THE WHEN'S
When is your birthday? November 25th, 1974
When did you last burn a candle? I can't remember but it was probably when I "forgot" to pay my light bill a few years back.
When did you wake up? 8:00 Am
When did you do laundry last? doing some right now

THE WHY'S
Why does basically half the world have a Myspace or Blog? I can't speak for 3 billion people
You really think half the world has one? Nope, there are too many people that don't have access to computer technology
Why did you take this particular survey? Cuz a pretty lady asked me to.
Why are you in love? Cuz she popping, she bouncing, she rolling, and she working that pole (T- Pain - In Love Wit A Stripper)


EDIT: 6PM: So keeping it real went okay, but I thought it would be more drama. Mostly everybody thought I was joking. I had a couple of highlights though: This other manager came up to me and asked me to pull a report for his team. I said I'm too busy, this is something that you should know how to do. He just stood there looking at me, like he couldnt believe it. Then to top it off, I said "Anything else? I'm busy" and walked away. It was too hilarious.

Secondly the stripper wannabe started laughing. I told her I wasn't joking, but she thought I was trying to keep a straight face. I also told her to stop talking to me, but she disregarded that too.

I also used the stupid question line, but again they thought I was just joking.

Maybe I didn't Keep it Real enough. Oh, well there's always tomorrow.

It was written...